Click on the links below to view some of the most
frequently asked questions about psychology and thinning hair:
 My
hair is thinning, and this is causing me to feel extremely depressed. Is it
unusual that I should let something like my hair make me emotionally low?
Hair thinning is emotionally stressful for most of the 43
million women over age 18 who experience it. Contemporary American culture
places a great deal of pressure on women to look young and beautiful, and a
woman's hair has been traditionally referred to as her "crowning glory." Almost
40% of women with thinning hair never expect it to happen to them, so the
realization may come as a shock. You can find tips on this website that can help
you address both the emotional and the physical aspects of hair thinning. If you
continue to feel depressed, you may want to contact your physician for an
evaluation.
Is it normal for me to feel alone
or inadequate?
Many women who realize their hair is thinning, or who are
unhappy with some aspect of their bodies or appearance, feel inadequate or
inferior as a result. Women with thinning hair may feel especially alone because
their condition isn't talked about as openly as is male hair loss. In fact,
women's hair thinning has been called "the last beauty taboo." But while you may
feel alone, you're actually not there are millions of women who are
experiencing similar hair loss and similar feelings. And, of course, having
thinning hair does not mean that you are inadequate, even if you feel so. It may
help to keep in mind not only that millions of women are in a similar situation,
but that the state of your appearance as a whole says nothing about your value
or adequacy as a human being. Imagine what you might think about another woman
with thinning hair. Your opinion of her would be largely based on her
personality, her attitude, and her behavior and even your opinion of her
appearance probably wouldn't be as harsh as her own, since most women are their
own worst critics. If you can view yourself with the same perspective and
kindness (which may take practice), you will feel much better.
I feel like I'm losing my
femininity. I feel less attractive to my partner. Why am I feeling like this?
Women often associate their hair with their femininity.
Research has found that women with thinning hair often report feeling less
feminine and less attractive. This website can provide you with styling tips
that address some of your concerns.
I've become obsessed with my
thinning hair. What can I do to focus on something else?
Great question! You are much more than your hair, or even
your appearance. While there's nothing wrong with doing what you can to address
thinning hair, focusing too much on one's real or perceived flaws is unhealthy.
Make sure your life is well-rounded (your personality, too!). Find hobbies and
activities you enjoy, and engage in them with relish. Consider doing volunteer
work in which you help others less fortunate. Make a "gratitude journal" in
which you list and write about only those things for which you are grateful and
about the good things that happen to you each day or week from a beautiful
sunset to a compliment at work or a hug from a friend or loved one. (While many
people do find it helpful to write in a journal about distressing experiences,
keep any such writings separate from your gratitude journal. That way, you can
read through your gratitude journal for a pick-me-up when you're feeling down.)
Do yoga, tai chi, qigong, or other practices that calm the mind and increase
appreciation of the body. In other words, live your life! If you still find it
difficult to stop thinking about your hair, consider consulting with a
psychologist or other therapist to learn behavioral techniques to counter
obsessive thinking.
I've accepted the fact that my
hair is thinning, but I feel that my partner is having a hard time with it. How
can we talk about it?
One possibility is to bring the subject up when you're
alone together. You could mention that you've sensed he or she might be having a
difficult time with your hair loss, and ask if your perception is correct. (It's
possible that you might be mistaken. Of course, sometimes we project onto others
feelings that really belong to us. Other times the other person might truly be
having some emotional difficulties, but for completely different reasons than we
thought reasons that have little to do with us.) If your partner is willing to
talk about your concerns, it would be important not to get defensive or
judgmental about any shared feelings your partner may be embarrassed or
ashamed of them and afraid of hurting your feelings. It might help to share some
of your own process of moving from denial to anger to sadness to acceptance, or
whatever your journey has been. If you are in a loving relationship with an
emotionally healthy partner, you both will continue to care about each other no
matter what your hair is like, and your relationship may become deeper as a
result of working through any troubling feelings.
I have a friend who is losing her
hair. What can I say or do to help?
Helping your friend can be a touchy matter. A lot depends
on whether she has acknowledged her hair loss to you. If she has, one option is
to ask her if she wants to talk about its effect on her. Really feeling heard
and understood by another can be powerfully relieving and healing. You can also
ask her how you might help. She may want reassurances that she's still
attractive and lovable, or an honest opinion on hairstyles, coloring, or other
aspects of her appearance. You can also tell her about this website as a
resource for information about the emotional and physical issues of hair
thinning. If she hasn't mentioned her hair loss to you, you have some choices to
make that depend upon what you know about her. Does she realize that her hair is
thinning, or is she in denial about her hair loss? Would she want you to bring
up the topic with her, or wait for her to bring it up herself? One possibility
is to mention that you've learned that millions of women are experiencing hair
thinning, and you have wondered if that could be a problem for her as well. If
she acknowledges it, you could then mention the Women's Institute for Fine and
Thinning Hair and direct her to some of its resources and, of course, offer
that willing ear and shoulder to lean on. But one of the most important things
you can do is to continue being a friend in all the ways you have been up to
now, which can help remind her that she's loved and valued no matter what the
status of her hair.
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Hair FAQs |
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